Accomplishment and Disclaimers

My second example of Accomplishment (stated as a belief and a practice in "A Treatise on Unity and Its Recognition, third installment on Accomplishment).

In Brene Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection, she tells a story of a woman who made fantastic jewelry. The woman had a booth at a conference Brown attended, and she was excited to go look at her wares. She was wearing a pair of her earrings. But when she talked to the woman, saying how gifted she was and didn’t she just love being a jewelry artist, the woman said, “Oh, I’m not really an artist. I don’t make a living at it. It’s just something I like to do.”

I’ve been like that too.

Now, this isn’t all the time. But when I’m with a friend who introduces me as someone who has published six books – the friend standing there, sort of glittering with pride – the first thing I want to say is, “Oh yes, well, my books aren’t popular and I don’t make a living at it.” Why do I want to do that? It’s like I want to cut short any admiration, any assumption that, having published six books, I’m actually a successful writer. And I’m as quick to say I’m not a spiritual teacher if an introduction implies that I am. You’d think I have no sense of accomplishment.’

It’s very odd because I do feel accomplished…and I don’t…which I think is what the whole thing we call “integration” is all about.

I know people just bursting with wisdom and talent and a desire to give. They know full well that they’re bursting with it, but what they don’t know is how to share it, how to share who they are. So they’re wondering – when am I going to be accomplished? Or when am I going to know who I am and what is mine to give? It isn’t a matter of not feeling wise or talented or spirited. It’s not that we have no sense of our accomplishment or that we don’t know we’re beloved. It’s more that we feel a vocational disconnect.

My friends who are bursting with wisdom, talent and a desire to give are doing it all the time. At least they’re inspiring me! Knowing them makes me feel absolutely grateful! I’m just delighted that we’re connected, that they share with me, that I know these incredible people.

Any of us can have a sense of our worthiness as a person or of the true importance of our work and yet feel this disconnect that leaves us feeling shy about claiming our accomplishment.

Maybe we’re not going to fulfill our potential until we find a way of expressing our inner sense of accomplishment. Or maybe we’re in a gestation period. It could be we’re finding our wings by sharing with each other. And it could be that we’re living on the edge, the cusp of the new, where who we are is a little ahead of the times. There’s all kinds of reasons of timing for the feeling of “not there yet.” Many of them are soulful. We’re finding our way.

Of course, this belief in accomplishment doesn’t only apply to worldly things, but it is in the way we see ourselves and our expression in the world – not just in the big stuff, but in our daily lives – that some of us most need to live out this belief.

It does no good to beat ourselves up for behaving foolishly. Disclaimers aren’t a great thing. They do just what the word implies – they disclaim who we are. I know this. I don’t plan to do my disclaiming thing anymore. I don’t need to hinder myself.

But I want to acknowledge that many of us have an inner yearning that says we must meet with that which we need to feel fulfilled. Essential worthiness and need fulfillment aren’t contradictory.

The story isn’t that of seeing one side of the coin as “bad” and the flip side as “good” but holding the tension of our yearning and our accomplishment.

We are enough, we are accomplished, even when we hinder ourselves, behave badly, or disclaim our gifts. That’s what we are to accept. To look at accomplishment, to see it, to catch a glimpse of how we feel, of what leads us to say the things we do, to demur or to boast or do any of those things that aren’t quite true to who we are, is to begin the work of acknowledging that we’re already accomplished, and no more so than anyone else.

I’ve seen that when I’m standing firmly in accomplishment, it results in a feeling of empowerment. I know that’s what I’ve felt from time to time, and it’s a wonderful feeling.

But it comes and goes.

This is why I’ve turned to practice. Why we practice. So that when such feelings arise, they stay a while.

We are already accomplished. The practice is for our benefit. So that we might feel empowered more often. This is great for us personally, and it aids us in giving our gifts to the world. Without that empowered feeling, we struggle more.

But we’re still accomplished. Born that way. Can’t ruin it.


Next – this belief/practice as it relates to our movement from learning to discovery.